Right now the lead headline on CBS 5 website is
Announcement: Bigfoot's Body Found. Which, I have to admit, I find both hilarious and bizarre. Are we really, as a nation
, eagerly awaiting word on whether a tall tale/urban legend is really a reality? Hell yes, we are!
There's gonna be a press conference in the South Bay in mere moments:A couple of hunters
from northern Georgia plan to hold a press conference at noon Friday at
the Cabana Hotel in Palo Alto to claim they have found the carcass of
the legendary creature known as "Bigfoot" or Sasquatch.
The
two hunters are teaming up with Tom Biscardi, head of a
California-based group called Searching for Bigfoot, and planned to
show off what they said is "DNA evidence and photo evidence" of
bigfoot's remains, but not the body itself. They claimed the body was
being kept under wraps.
Photos released online showed the large, hairy beast crammed into a freezer where it was apparently being preserved.
Biscardi
said he believed the find was authentic. Many other details of the
expedition and the exact location where the body was found were being
kept a secret until Friday's announcement.
According to a press release issued by the men, the creature:
• Stands 7-feet-7-inches tall.
• Weighs more than 500 pounds.
• Looks part human and part ape-like.
• Is male.
• Has reddish hair and blackish-gray eyes.
• Has two arms and two legs, and five fingers on each hand and five toes on each foot.
• Has flat feet that are similar to human feet.
• Has a footprint that is 16.75 inches long and 5.75 inches wide at the heel.
• Has hands that are 11.75 inches long from the palm to the tip of the middle finger and are 6.25 inches wide.
• Walked upright. (apparently it was seen earlier in the day before the body was found)
• Has teeth that are more human-like than ape-like.
• Has been undergoing DNA testing.
One of my favorite quotes from one of the supposed Bigfoot finders is this:
"Whitton tells the Clayton News Daily that people who call the creature a hoax are just jealous."
Hahaha, haters.
They want to be Bigfoot! Oh, America. You are crazy, but you know I love you.
I'll link up some video from this press conference as soon as we get it.